Do some looking around most anywhere these days and you will find some kind of discussion as to the redeeming social values of poker, or lack thereof. While most of us take the game seriously, the fact is, for a majority of us it is just a hobby (that takes a lot of our time). I also think that many of us would like to do something to “contribute”. I am not wealthy by any stretch, and save a few specific organizations, I blanche a bit at the thought of giving my hard earned money to most charities. I’m not sure why, but I think that the Seinfeld episode with George Costanza’s Human Fund has something to do with it.
Since it is Friday and the second installment of “Unnecessary Shit”, this would probably be the most appropriate time to explain it’s origins a bit. (For typing ease I will begin referring to it as US, how mildly ironic),
It was during my time in the military that my friend Jonbo first introduced me to US. It is in a nutshell, this: Any wildly random action taken that doesn’t fit into current context in any way, shape, or form. Perhaps a couple of examples would be better……
- You're at a store (type doesn’t matter, but the more subdued, the better) wearing, say, flip-flops or some other loose-fitting footwear. Everyone around you is shopping quietly and nicely. You suddenly let out a “Hup!”, kick your leg, and then chase after your footwear that just flew to a random location. This will prompt some priceless looks from observers, ranging from disgust to pity because quite obviously, engaging in this type of behavior must surely mean you are retarded in some way. Regardless or your age, you can literally see people wondering where your mother is.
- In this example you are at work, which is often the most entertaining place of them all to engage in US. Equipment needed: Empty (or very close to it) plastic water bottle, the shape and size are of no import. While standing around talking to a couple of co-workers (the bigger the group the better), if the conversation begins to lull or grows tiresome, simply yell out the aforementioned “Hup!”, whip yourself around 180 degrees and chuck the bottle as hard as you can, and turn back around as though nothing out of the ordinary happened. This works especially well in rooms with a hard tile floor (as opposed to ‘soft’ tile?) as it will make an incredible amount of noise. From those who know you, this should prompt some ‘your pretty weird, but I think it’s pretty funny’ looks. From the ones you don’t really care to know or don’t really like, this will keep them at a healthy and respectful distance going forward.