Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Eezy Breezy

**cue Home Simpson voice** Mmmmm…Phoeniiiiiixx……Auuuggggghhhhhhh.

There is without a doubt no better time to be in a desert climate, let me tell ‘ya. When I get back there is going to be some hard lobbying to move here ASAP. I’ll trade four months of extreme hot for some nice winter months any day of the week.

I figured that immediately upon my arrival I would be itching to get onto the computer and do a post about how pissed I was at airlines, since that is usually the effect they have on me. In an unexpected turn of events, I arrived in a great mood despite flying here on a plane not much larger than an oyster tin. The TSA didn’t even piss me off, which if you know me at all, is an extremely RARE event. I think it was the nice old lady I was seated next to on the plane. I actually got the chance to be a good boy and help her with her bags and getting on and off the plane.

Yes, I can hear you asking. “Wouldn’t you do that anyway?”

NO. Wanna know why?

Most old ladies these days are friggin’ nasty old bitches. Well, most of the ones in my area, anyway. I always thought that most old ladies were nice, but it seems in the last couple of years they are harder and harder to come by. It makes me sad, really. I mean what better feeling than helping out an old lady who’s actually nice? It’s helps out the karma and satisfies the inner Boy Scout. The last time, I held the door open for a lady (at considerable inconvenience, I might add) and she didn’t even say anything, she just looked at me like I it was my job and walked brusquely by with nary a word.

This prompted a quick, “Well fuck you too.”

“You’re awful.”

“Well, next time I’ll try to be a little less awful and not hold the door. Have a nice trip you nasty old bitch.”

Maybe not the right thing to say, but it damn sure made me feel better. This trip restored my faith. Thank You nice old lady from L.A.

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I tried to be pissed at my hotel, but I just can’t be, the weather is too damn nice right now. I was completely pumped that The Shield was starting tonight, but my hotel doesn’t have the FX channel. In fact they hardly have ANY channel that’s worth watching. I figured that it wasn’t so bad since I had the WPT to keep me company on Wednesday, but guess what? That’s right, no Travel Channel either. Meh.

Given the lack of cable channels and the fact that I am immersed in all that is nerdy this entire week, please don’t be surprised at any unusually high levels of boring shit in any of my posts this week. (Say, this one, for example)

Speaking of all that is nerdy, I thought of something I’d like to have on a t-shirt. This probably won’t make sense to quite a few, so if it doesn’t just bear with me, it’ll be over soon.

T-Shirt Witticism: I’m rejecting your packets.

Yeah I know, it’s probably already been put on a shirt already and /or is not as amusing or witty as I think, but as you can plainly see, that’s not stopping me.

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I think I’m going to try and hit up a poker room tomorrow and actually try to profit from this trip a bit, which would be nice. Anyone have any suggestions for a good place to play in Phoenix/Tempe? A cardroom report would certainly be fun and would also help with the “I miss my wife and dogs” doldrums. What a sap I am. What a word, doldrums. Sounds like something a nice old lady or a Boy Scout would say.