Human Head Thinks Big: Edge of the Knife: Day Three, Part III

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

It was noon and the cocktails were beginning to get to me. I wondered if perhaps I should indulge in a bit of water, but a snippet of memory from the military came back to me….

Suck it up and press on, soldier.

With this exhortation encouraging me, I was off to the bar. Or, perhaps I already had VSOP #7 in hand and was wandering around the slots and bar talking to everyone that I could, it’s hard to say. In my drunken state I made an easily forgettable mental note that I should probably start taking some actual notes, but I couldn’t find my notebook. Betwixt thee and me, I think it was gallivanting in Mrs. Head’s purse and I was too busy jabbering to go find her.

In a hazy state like mine you can see the edge approaching. It’s not near enough to worry about, but you know it’s on the way. Events and conversations get soft around the edges and begin jumbling a bit. While the order may be a bit off in my head, I remember all of the great conversations I had with Iggy, Pauly, Bob, JP Costales, Maudie, and Derek about a wide variety of things. I knew the drinks would eventually cause me to literally fall over, but it was the conversation that figuratively knocked me on my ass. Over a month later I’m still amazed that I actually met so many people that I can talk religion or politics with (who don’t necessarily agree) in a rational manner without anyone flying into a rage and spouting bland propaganda. As I made my way through VSOP #8 and #9 and more conversation I tried to think of a word that would accurately describe it all.

Sublime.

I was reveling in the satisfaction that comes with finding the perfect word when AlCantHang cruised by…..with EVERYONE in tow. Apparently, it was time to go to La Salsa for the tournament afterparty, but I was simply in shock that it was already 5 PM. I certainly felt like it was 5 PM, but the less drunk among us informed me that we were just coming up on 3 PM. Oops. I merged with the crowd and we were off on our short trek.

The short trek from The Aladdin to La Salsa as it was full of great moments. I’ll leave most of what happened on the trek unsaid, but I will say that Pauly and I pornslapped the hell out of many an unsuspecting pedestrian. We even pornslapped the pornslappers and got cussed in Spanish for our efforts. Ingrates.

La Salsa wasn’t ready, and quite frankly neither was I, but I wasn’t about to admit it to anyone. I can’t imagine what the wait staff must have thought about getting waylaid two hours ahead of schedule by a whole crowd of people hopped up on alcohol, tournament poker, and good vibes. AlCantHang, the Pied Piper of poker bloggers, the Patton of many a partying campaign, made some deft moves and we took over the back of the place.

Hijinks ensued. I tried to survive.

It’s very nearly impossible to balance on the edge of a knife, but I managed to do it for nearly three hours. There weren’t many conversations during that time where I uttered more than a few words, the edge had arrived out of nowhere and I was trying not to fall off the other side. To some it may have looked or seemed as though I wasn’t having any fun, but rest assured it was a complete blast (even with that gutbomb of a burrito inside me), and getting to see EvaCantHang maneuver Mrs. Head into some drunken karaoke was my one of my personal highlights. I’m pretty sure she’s the only person on the planet who could have gotten her to do that; Mrs. Head does NOT do karaoke. Never underestimate the power of great folks + yards of margarita.

It was around 6 PM when I finally gave up the balancing act and teetered off the edge. We took a cab with Gracie and Co. back downtown, and I wondered if I had ever been so happy to see a comfortable bed. I slept for a couple of hours and woke feeling much better but still not too hot as we made our way over to the Plaza to see what degenerate activities were taking place. Not wanting to join another mixed game, Mrs Head and I headed up with Pauly, Derek, Halverson, and Spaceman to the suite for some poker.

The suite was sweet. The first thing I wondered upon entering was where the film crew was hiding. It was the type of room equally suited to making porn or snuff films, and was the perfect underbelly setting for a late night SnG. Mrs. Head and I both lost, and there’s no sense in rehashing more than that. It was the perfect thing to do while imbibing late into the night.

Coming back downstairs I still found myself with a jones for some –EV Let it Ride, but the late hour hit me square in the gut. No more balancing. It was time to head back to the room and say goodbye to the edge forever. Well, maybe not forever, but at least until the next time we hit this town.

Besides, Mrs. Head informed me that we had to get up and hit the outlet malls in the morning.

Sunuva….