Friday, July 08, 2005

WSOP Questions

This main event stuff is pretty exciting, yes?

But even amidst my own excitement and desire for on the minute detailed updates ala Pauly, Otis, or the boys at LasVegasVegas, I find myself here in this damnable cube asking some strange questions. Like….

After the WSOP, what’s going to happen to all of those tables?

Even though it is the exact opposite of glamorous, why doesn’t the Rio put up some Port-a-Lets? Would they fundamentally “tarnish” the WSOP somehow? How much money could one make from trying to sell Stadium Pals to the players?

Speaking of stadiums, I wonder if next year they will have to/try to hold the main event in one (or convention center, et al)? Would the logistics of such a thing, i.e. keeping control of chips, make such a task impossible?

How much will the top hookers make this week? Do you think that the top earner gets a gift certificate or anything? Perhaps they receive a “Top Performer” certificate that can be framed and mounted. Or maybe their pimp gives them a “Get out of a beating Free” card. Pauly, if you happen by here in the .4 minutes that you have free, consider doing an expose on the working ladies of the WSOP, I know you want to.

With the wildly puritanical “no F-bomb” rule, has anyone coined a temporary substitute for this versatile swearword? Flark yeah! Do they penalize you for saying shit? What if you have tourettes syndrome? ShitFuck.

More questions may be added as the day drags on. I'm Thinking Big, while my head faithfully remains Much Bigger.