Time to ramble. Given the borderline insane comment I just left on Speaker's post, reflection tells me I obviously have something that probably ought to come out, lest it sets in begins to fester.
"That's a nice looking car"
We thought it and said it at about the same time. And this time, as with (or so it seems) most other times, these words are inevitably followed by, "Too bad it's a Chrysler." Knowing about "Chrysler Quality" means being doomed to looking around and being disappointed every time you get into traffic. Anyway, we were talking about the neighbor's girlfriend's apparent new car purchase.
"I always wonder why Nancy drives that minivan."
"What minivan? She drives an SUV."
"Well, it's more mini-van than SUV, I think"
The words lept out at me like a TV commercial and in fact sounded just like it when uttered. Obviously, there isn't really any other way to say that, it was just strange and got me to thinking about language. Something along the lines of it not being used as well as it should be, in general as well as personally.
The language of my work environment is eating away at my cerebrum like a cancer. It's dulling, and makes me feel like I'm becoming mute, because if I open my mouth to speak I may scream and never stop. New perspective isn't necessarily all it's cracked up to be sometimes. When transforming into something that is in many ways the opposite of everything around you, it is difficult not feeling completely strange some days.
Goddamn, I'm almost 31. Another year gone. Add on another day of......stuff, mostly miserable, expensive, annoying, and inconvenient STUFF. Treadmill activities, the stuff of beasts who can't or won't know any better. I despise the beast that speaks commercials and find that I desperately want to become something other than that.
Truthfully, I likely just simply need to cool down (Christ it's fucking hot) and get some sleep. Tomorrow is a new day, or so they say. I certainly would like one of those, because they've all been looking like the same tired days I've lived already. It may be cliche to invoke HST righ now, but seriously, How long, o Lord, how long?
Thanks for reading this episode of My Early Mid-Life Crisis.
(Get me out of this fucking city)
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
Speaking commercially
Friday, June 01, 2007
Verbosities Material--5/31
Governer Rick Perry heads to Bilderberg
If you can't see it, it doesn't exist.
A serious and sober account of Gitmo.
Ron Paul Interview--5/31
By their actions you'll know them
Thursday "Are you still awake?"/Friday "Good Morning!" Edition
Unbelievable, but true.
Technorati Tags: Verbosities content
Friday, May 25, 2007
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Alicia Silverstone stock on the rise
O Snap.
If you have no idea why I put this up, Google about Rosie and Elizabeth on the View and catch up.
I, also, have moments where I cannot pull away from the drama buglight. They are normally brief, but this looks like one of those times.
Sad
The Gin Blossoms are playing at a housing development.
So, I know that's worse than the fair, but here's the question.
Is it worse than playing a prom?
Jetsetting Impotent Hamsters
No I'm not referring to our politicians.
Here ya go--a little morning nonsense.
They tell us it's to help the internal clock adjust to travelling east. I think it's actually a few high-profile hamsters with too much job stress who've developed an inability to "swing it like real hamster-men", as it were. It's a little known problem--there should probably be some sort of charity event to raise awareness for this...."Get it up for Hamsters" or something. Attack people who don't seem to care with questions like "how would you like it if you couldn't bone anything? Hamsters have needs too, you cold-hearted bastards!"
Christ. I need to stay offline until I've been awake for at least an hour.
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
You don't need to read this.
Tidbit on the newest aspiring overlord.
Only three more hours of listening to instructor droning, then I can look forward to an infuriating 45 min. drive home due to the class location.
Just another 14 hour workday--Thank the maker for Xanadus.
Note to self: Trim nails before trying to blog in a serious training class--entirely too much keyboard noise. The looks I'm getting, you'd think I was trying to put on a puppet show starring my schlong.
Stupid creepy nerds. It's just typing.
UPDATE: My ass hurts. Who made these chairs? For that matter, who is the dumb fuck that actually thought buying them was a good idea?
Friday, May 18, 2007
Morning Dick Jokes, brought to you by Nature
There is such a volume of possibility here, I'm rendered useless underneath its weight. Have fun.
Thursday, May 17, 2007
New Post Elsewhere
Today's post went up on Verbosities.
Ron Paul and the FOX "debate"
Many thanks to his verbose highness, BG, for the invite to post on his newly created space. Now go quickly and link it up, visit every day, and commit to sharing its gospel with at least one person per day.
Thus saith The Lord.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
Killer buds
Don't think this needs too much more comment.
The department's investigation began with a 911 call from Sanchez's home on April 21, 2006. On a 5-minute tape of the call, obtained by the Free Press, Sanchez told an emergency dispatcher he thought he and his wife were overdosing on marijuana.
"I think we're dying," he said. "We made brownies and I think we're dead, I really do."
Globalization + War on Terror = Freedom Bath
Original Here
Raids across Germany on G-8 fears
By KIRSTEN GRIESHABER, Associated Press Writer Wed May 9, 8:00 AM ET
BERLIN - Police raided the premises of leftist groups in cities across Germany Wednesday on suspicion of a plot to attack next month's G-8 summit.
| ADVERTISEMENT |
More than 900 federal and local police officers in cities including Berlin, Hamburg and Bremen searched some 40 apartments or offices used by various leftist groups, federal prosecutors said in a statement.
The prosecutors said they were investigating more than 18 individuals suspected of organizing a terrorist group. They said they were focused on dismantling a Web server where many leftists and groups and projects maintained their internet sites and mailing lists.
"The militant extreme left groups and their members are suspected of having founded a terrorist group, or of being members of such an organization, with the specific goal of staging firebombings and other violent attacks in order to disrupt or prevent the upcoming G-8 summit," the statement said.
The Anti-Fascist Leftists of Berlin said the searches targeted activists who were organizing protests against the summit of the Group of Eight industrialized nations.
"The only point of these searches is to criminalize and disrupt the protests against the G-8," the group said. "The accusation that terrorists would coordinate their movements through a leftist-run Internet server is ridiculous."
Federal investigators have expressed concern the summit in the Baltic Sea resort of Heiligendamm could be a target for attack.
In December, anti-G-8 activists splashed paint on a hotel at the resort in northeastern Germany.
G-8 summits have often been a magnet for protests against globalization. At a summit in Genoa in 2001, the demonstrations turned violent, with protesters and police battling in the streets for days.
German security officials have built a $17 million fence around the resort in an effort to keep protesters from the event, hosted by German Chancellor Angela Merkel. The leaders of the United States, Russia, Britain, France, Italy, Canada, and Japan are also to attend.
Oh God, a meme
It is I. He, now known as “used to write a poker blog, sort of”.
The Head. Given leave to be a freak in new ways.
I wonder often as to why I have not been definitively shunned by the PoBlo Community* and forced to wander alone in the electronic wilderness searching for a new home given that any pretense to writing more than twice a year on the subject of poker is completely and utterly gone for the foreseeable future.
Color me happy. I love my degenerate, ghey pals.
*(sounds just as unwieldy as “poker blogging community”, but with a spiffy pop-PR veneer. Perhaps we can get a jump on things and create our own UN Habitat for Sustained Development before we’re all forced into enclaves with people we hate. We now have the name!)
As an aside, another thing I wonder about is why some (including myself) are so inclined to toss out personal “little known things” to the electronic masses. I hope it’s something deeper and more complex than abject narcissism, because if that’s true I’m gonna be kind of sad. I didn’t say I’d stop. I just said it would make me sad. Any further posts of mine you might read would simply have to be with the knowledge that I was sniffing and crying rivulets while compulsively typing like a heroin-addicted baboon with intimate knowledge of what he is. A horrifying thought, to be sure.
Or, Maudie (9th degree tagging professional) could be the NSA trying to build a psychological profile on me for future exploitation. Whatever the case, there seems to be some sense of “do I really want to do this?” that hangs about. Not that such thoughts ever stopped me before. I’m just sayin’.
Here are some little known things about me for your voyeuristic pleasure—
1. I’m black. I know, I look white. You’ll just have to trust me.
2. I’m constantly looking to squeegee my third eye. However you want to take that is fine with me. (if either way is true, does that count as two? I always have been an overachiever—oops, there’s three)
3. I’m one of those people, at least in part. I looked around one day and realized I had two miniature dogs with names beginning in the same letter like some suburbanite cutesy mushhead. Simon and Stella, who I treat for the most part like actual kids and refer to them as such at least half of the time. I should beat myself up.
4. I crapped my pants once in kindergarten. Full on. I still can’t talk very much about it. Although, nowadays I project supreme “I won’t soil myself” confidence by going full-time commando (dammit, that’s two again).
5. I still listen to Natalie Merchant’s Tigerlily at least twice a year. It’s some weird biomusicalogical clock thing. Why am I telling you people this?
6. I think Hitler was just misunderstood. Okay, that’s a dirty lie. I just wanted to get your mind off of #5 for a second.
7. I’m of the mind that it would be much better to be deaf than it would be to be blind. I could live without hearing much easier than I could without books. Seriously, the absence of books would be a devastating blow.
I'm terrible at these games.
Next Up—
Change100
Facty (who needs to be tagged multiple times, as she is missed)
Derek
Pauly (just because it will probably annoy him)
And a Happy Midlife Crisis to Ignatious, the biggest little guy evar.
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
America, grab on to this guy....
...and don't let go.
From Ron Paul's site--
Press Release
Ron Paul Builds Momentum
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
May 8, 2007
ARLINGTON, VA – Congressman Ron Paul's support has soared since the first Republican presidential debate. Conservative commentator John McLaughlin, host of “The McLaughlin Group," cited Ron Paul as having given "the best performance of the debate." In fact, the Paul campaign's apparent strength has many other pundits scrambling to explain it. Paul campaign officials offer the following examples of the candidate's rising success.
Since the debate on May 3, Ron Paul:
- Handily won two post-debate polls posted by event sponsor MSNBC
- Placed a close third (18%) in a post-debate poll on the conservative Drudge Report
- Won an ABCNews.com online debate poll with 84%
- Won a C-SPAN online GOP candidate poll with 69%
- Became the third most-mentioned person in the blogosphere, beating out Paris Hilton, according to the reputable Technorati.com
- Produced a YouTube.com video that was ranked the 8th most popular overall video, and the most-viewed political video
- Was featured, by popular demand, on the front of Digg.com
- Generated so many bulletin posts on MySpace.com that the site owner News Corp. blocked all additional posts about Dr. Paul
- Became a "most searched" term on Google and Yahoo!
- Saw a quadrupling of daily visitors to RonPaul2008.com
"These figures speak for themselves," said campaign chairman Kent Snyder. "Ron Paul has quickly become a strong contender for the GOP nomination because of his powerful message of freedom and limited government."
Monday, May 07, 2007
Breaking News
I thought this might be important in light of the ever-widening (except scope of reporting) outreach of the tainted pet food recall.
Bulletin from yahoo health.
Dear Cheryl Koch M.S, R.D.,
Certainly this has been a momentous news day, your article being the icing on the proverbial cake. Since you were likely busy slaving over what must have been massive intellectual peaks to write such substantive material, there’s little doubt that you didn’t have time to learn what I did today. So, to demonstrate my gratitude for this neurological manna from the heavens, allow me to reciprocate in what ways I can by sharing the things that I learned today. I know it’s not much, but it’s all I have.
--The earth in fact IS round, something you probably already knew. What I bet you weren’t aware of was that it floats through this stuff/thing called “space.” Yeah, I know. Heavy. Let it take a while to sink in, and if you’re so inclined we can get more into the subject later. I’m warning you, it’s big.
--The pope, rather than being the godfather over a cadre of pedophiles—no not all of them, but still, a whole fucking lot --(who it seems must have been regularly sharpening his teeth since his ascendance to the pope throne, and who also looks a bit more like Bela Lugosi every day), are you sitting down, is CATHOLIC.
--Paris Hilton and her retinue of drunken minor celebrity debutantes, it turns out, really do not matter. Whatsoever. I know, I couldn’t believe it either.
--The craziest item of the day is that the sun came up this morning. Who could’ve seen that one coming? I mean, Jesus, it had been dark for like, 8 hours. Good thing I decided not to lay that C-note down on the homeless guy who gave me 1000-1 on the reappearance of that insidious Global Warmer (and by Global Warmer, I mean Earth Killer).
I do have a couple questions in closing, though.
Do they actually pay you money for writing this, or are you being blackmailed? What was it? Cocaine and hermaphrodite midgets? You can tell us.
How does it make you feel to have sold your soul?
Yours in incredulousness and anger,
HH
Friday, May 04, 2007
Masturdebating
There are now less than 24 hours before folks begin breaking out the tequila and attempting to injure themselves with it while workers at the Corona bottling plant enjoy the beginnings of what I can only think to call the “surge” season. Frat boys and Paris-a-like’s rejoice. Begin your pilgrimages to the Fat Tuesday’s of the world, Cinco is nearly upon us.
The savages know it as Cinco de Mayo. Go crazy, spread liberally.
**********
Here are my hastily scrawled notes/thoughts while watching last night’s GOP debates online (I missed the first 15 mins), trying not to rave too much while on the girly chat with BG, cook dinner, and catch up on at least some of the news I haven’t had time to stay current with this week.
(this stuff took me a bit to translate, an unavoidable consequence of combining feverish speed with left-handedness)
--Am I watching a séance? These freaks will not stop invoking Reagan. Thankfully Ron Paul has avoided embarrassing himself by not doing so.
--Iran, scary, nuclear, nuclear, nuclear, jihad, global jhad, Hezbollah, Hamas, Iran, scary, imply 9/11, tragedy, scary, security, help Israel, enemies, allies, Iran scary, terrorist, terrorist, nuclear, nuclear, nuclear
--Romney really, really likes this War of Civilizations idea. His war boner is as big as McCain or Ghouliani’s—he just has better pleats in his slacks to obfuscate it. (the word “obfuscate” took the longest to translate this morning. On the page, it’s more like an “o” followed by some sort of mad foreign chicken scribble. It’s either “obfuscate” or I’ve begun writing “in tongues” due to unintentional fits of Holy Sprit drunkenness—Cinco IS coming, you know.)
--Brownback—**make turd joke on upcoming post** (how anyone can hear that name, know anything about the guy, and NOT think about some variation of the stinky brown matter of our lives is beyond me. Juvenile? Perhaps. Don’t care.)
--Haven’t heard the word (or discussion of) habeas, rendition, wiretapping, or torture yet. Wonder how long the odds are I will hear all three, let alone any one discussed in any depth whatsoever? -
-Ghouliani (in particular, seem to love DBs) and everyone else jumping on National ID bandwagon. Paul (finally gets a few seconds) says opposite. Matthews gives Romney/Ghouliani a take-back freebie. Both respond, Oh, I was talking about only illegal aliens. Oh, I thought you knew that, that I/we made that clear. **Christ, what a farce this is**
Those are my notes. Like I said, there was a lot going on. Ron Paul got screwed, which was not unexpected, as he is/was the only thinking individual on that stage. The “debate” was at the same time and in equal parts both sad and frightening to watch in all of its farcical glory.
Per usual, Glenn Greenwald has some great observations of his own.
**********
And in “GW throws people a bone” headlines, he is threatening to veto the new Hate Crimes Bill (HR 1592). As much as I despise the guy, this is a veto I’m cheering, for what I hope would be obvious reasons. One has only to look over at Britain to see what kind of politically correct neo-lib hell this bill will eventually rain down on our heads. If Bush is lying (which is certainly not out of the realm of distinct possibility) and does sign this bill, we will be a much larger step closer to true thought-crime.
I can hear the confusion now. How in the world do I rave against Bush and most everything GOP/fundamental Christianist but say that I cheer him in this spot?
Herein lies my biggest frustration with a lot of the lefty blogs/news orgs I read. All of these otherwise intelligent people (and I’m really referring to sides of the fence here) are still locked into an idiotic all-or-nothing mindset. Rather than rationally think for themselves, they latch on to simplistic logic combined with their vehement “I hate that guy” attitude (which many times is in large part justified) to fuel them in their primarily emotion-based contrary actions whether or not those actions make any real sense. In no way does my support for this veto mean that I support any sort of religious or sexual orientation motivated violence, although I’m sure that many will gloss right over these words and accuse me of the same.
What violent crime isn’t motivated by hate on some level? If someone is beaten to death with this law in place, will the murderer in question suddenly be required to argue that he did so “dispassionately” in order to avoid extra years in prison, or, when it comes out that the victim was a Greco Indian gay tranny wiccan are the extra years simply tacked on automatically?
Regardless, stupid people everywhere will breathe a sigh of relief that another “hateful monster” was put away thanks to the new Hate Crime Laws and its fantastic protections. Unfortunately the Matthew Shepards of the world will still be dead, more will continue piling up, and nobody will acknowledge it, other than to scream for still tougher Hate Crime Bills and more stringent gun control. Politicians, whores that they are, will continue with the same promises of results via “tough new laws” that they “guarantee” will not affect your Free Speech Rights.
If you believe that the practical application of this will not affect Free Speech, I’ve got a lucrative real estate deal you’ll probably find intriguing, as well. Again, go see how the folks over in Britain are doing with hate crime laws and study the reality of just how unaffected their free speech is. For god’s sake, they’ve got frickin’ special police squads that go “undercover” in restaurants trying to bust people for “hate speech”. The War on Hate seems like a load of fun for the average Briton.
It is in this way that, just like with War on Drugs/Terror/etc., the “War on Hate” will become institutionalized with bigger budgets, louder rhetoric, and even less favorable results. These laws won’t breed less hate, they will breed more because every single group, large and small, will be fighting with the others trying to gain the title of “most victimized”, thus gaining the greater share of Federal assistance and favor.
How many black males, battered housewives, and bashed gays (who know from experience that law enforcement will provide them little or no help, and likely the opposite) will we have to find out about before people start realizing that the government can’t, won’t, and doesn’t care to “take care” of anyone but itself? Remember this: The local police in Virginia were ordered by the Feds to stand down and not rush the building and interrupt the psychotic on a killing spree.
Laws like this are just another example of less power for the individual/citizenry and more for the Federal apparatus-a bad thing for thinking people anywhere, regardless of race, creed, gender, or political bent.
Not a fun thought to deal with, to be sure, but one that must be nonetheless confronted with some reality and clear thinking lest we become still further bogged down in the politically correct machine, a place where the chance of extricating ourselves from it become slim to none.
**********
Here are a few other items that should have made big news, but somehow managed to escape the vigilant watch of our national corporate media, who evidently don’t find these issues to be “issues”.
All Telcos will be immune for helping wield the police state hammer. Justice, baby. Not only blind, but evidently retarded as well. Plus, even though they’ve supposedly “shut it down”, the government still says it can spy on you whenever. The words "brazen" and "flouting" seem appropriate here.
US and EU agree to single market. As for US media reporting on this, it was VERY scant. That must be because it’s not important, right? Your new bosses in Brussels will be kind. They promise.
And lastly, another look to Britain—where it’s becoming easier and easier to punish truth. Secret trials...delicious.
That’s it. Now go get your Cinco on. Cheers.
How did you get this number?
How goes it folks?
It’s been said that all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. I wonder why they never mention the fact that it also makes Jack cranky and exhausted.
Oh, right. I’m here to speak about focusing on the positive.
Today at work I received a phone call from a lady in Finance (o god, an accountant), who was evidently having some sort of voicemail issue. Shoving aside the discussion on how and why Enterprise VoIP (in addition to telecommunications systems and companies that must be dealt with in relation to said systems, in general) makes me want to shoot myself in the face, I’ll simply make note of the way this lady commenced an unstoppable blathering as soon as I answered the phone.
I’m not sure how widespread this is in general, but I’m increasingly finding that intra-company calls don’t have near the decorum they had even six months ago. Is it not only customary, but courteous in general to identify yourself over the phone to someone with whom you DO NOT have regular dealings? Not only do these people in question increasingly fail to say who they are, but also display a tendency to immediately begin demanding things (as soon as I courteously identify myself).
Although, it does seem like most of these types are the ones who specifically should not even have my direct line telephone number in the first place. Note to self: Yell at boss AGAIN at the next opportunity to stop giving out our number willy-nilly and encouraging these people to just “give us a call”. Regardless, if things keep going as they have, I’m going to have no choice but to up the intensity level of my telephonic rebukes. And I mean no choice. Things are just escaping my lips before I even know they’re gone, which brings me back to the Finance creature.
At long last I managed to stem her oral diuretics long enough to get the info necessary to pull documentation and see who was working on her issue. I began to read through the notes to get some idea of what was really happening. The tech in question had “fixed” the problem that was never really a problem. This was a PEBKAC* issue. Right when I started to try and tell her about it, she received an email stating that her issue had been resolved.
*Problem Exists Between Keyboard And Chair
Of course, she, being from Finance, kept informing me in no uncertain terms that the problem was NOT fixed and that so-and-so (who I am evidently supposed to know, more poor etiquette) tried to call and couldn’t leave a voicemail.
Did it ever occur to you that the person who tried to call you may be every bit as, if not more, empty-headed than you are!?!?
That’s what I screamed in my head, not out loud. I was still hanging on but only by a thread. I wanted only to explain in one simple sentence that I would have the tech call her when he returned from his meeting. No joy, the oral diarrhea was flowing once more.
Since I had been interrupted from other work by taking the call in the first place, I told her I was reading more notes while I worked on the issue she originally interrupted, making her wait. She didn’t notice, of course, opting instead to go into a holding pattern of “pleasant talk.”
“How is your day going?”
I’m sorry, did you just ask me something and then actually stop making noise?
“It’s not bad (till you called me- be amicable, be amicable), you know, for being at work. (I wouldn’t really say I’ve been missing it, Bob)
“Well, at least you’re getting a paycheck, right?”
“Uhhhhh, yeaaaaah.
Thanks, lady. What a new and positive revelation sure to add meaning and uplift me as I go about the rest of my day. Thanks for “Paying it Forward” or whatever the fuck it is you’re doing.
“I just always try to focus on the positive”
(I wish I was podcasting this, so I could do the voice. Ewww, the whiny, trying to compensate for inner misery by erecting a shield of pop-religio-psychobabble-positivity bullshit to cover it in the hopes that everyone will think she's just as happy as she's trying to put on, voice)
“What does it profit a man if he gains all the world’s riches, but loses his soul?”
Whoa! Where did that come from?
Dead silence, and that is not an exaggeration-she stopped cold. The only other word out of her mouth for the (quite shortened) remainder of our conversation was, “okay.” Telling the story makes my head flash with visions of her still at the desk holding the phone, blinking, these 11 hours later.
Funny, yes, but also slightly disconcerting was my own Hershey Squirt of the mouth. One minute I’m trying to maintain cordiality in the face of all that is awful, and the next finds me tossing a Scriptural/philosophical brick on a woman who, judging from her ability to work a telephone, likely struggles in fathoming the intricate mysteries of preparing Lean Cuisine dinners.
Other questions/remarks that flashed through my mind, pre-Jesus Tourettes:
-You must know about “The Secret”.
-Do you know who moved my cheese?
-Have you ever been to Guyana?
-Tell me about your latest scrapbooking project.
-Yeah, I read Tony Robbins once, too. The scene went bad when I mixed in some Carlton Sheets and woke up three days later with a “For Rent” sign stuck in my ass.
